Asteroids

Back again with a shiny new poem.

I know there are some people who read this already, and what I am about to say might give one or more of those people an impression about my thoughts that I have not yet fully established. but I'll try anyway, hoping I don't stir such feelings the wrong way, or even if they are the correct, I don't anyone to draw to conclusions about this prematurely, before I myself figured out these feelings within myself.

These last few months I had the pleasure of meeting, befriending, relying on, and supporting an intimate few people who became very important to my life in unique ways. I feel like we click, I feel safe around them, and I can rely on them for honesty and comfort alike, and, if I may be so bold, what more could I want out of life? They open up to me, and share with me their secrets, and daily struggles. it is touching to me that they trust me to that extent, and I shall never reveal what these ladies are going through, but I know that they somehow gather the strength to overcome it, and I do what I can to be there for them, solely for their benefit, because as I said, I enjoy their company and trust in me.

This is where it gets harder to write this, and tried to articulate it in the poem... In truth, though, there are more than two comets on this collision course. I... actually feel like with the amount of trust they put in me, the way they smile at me even when I don't know what I could possibly tell them. they seem to trust in me more than they do other people. Am I in the right to infer that they are trying to hint at me something? Did one or more of these ladies develop feelings for me, but are waiting for me to say something about it first? maybe I am overthinking a good thing. I consider my friendship with them a blessing, and even if nothing becomes of it, I hope they do, too.

I was never the person someone about this sort of thing well. I wouldn't even know from where I'd approach it. If I choose one, would I have to lose contact with the others? If I don't choose someone, would she be offended? Would asking any of them people out be exploitative if I'm ask her out when she's going through hard times?

If any of these ladies are reading this, I don't want to build an expectation among you. You mean a lot to me, but I don't know myself how I feel about all of this. I don't want you to think something could happen before I made this soul searching within myself. I don't think you need to do this soul searching either, if you haven't yet. because I'm not sure if I'll ever voice myself about it, outside this text box. I'm not sure how I would react if you spoke to me about it, either, as much as I burn to know if you are asking yourself that question, too, it's not an easy question for me to answer because I haven't quite finished asking the question within myself, especially when there is more than one person who raises these questions within me. please understand. I had to voice these thoughts, but I'm not quite ready for what consequences may arise for for voicing them. If you view me as disloyal, I would understand, though it was absolutely not my intention. I'm sorry. I probably didn't think this through, but If I don't voice these thoughts, they would be trapped and grow stronger, harsher within me without an outlet.